On re-reading terri's posts so far, I notice two things, and it is these I want to write about today.
The first is about how wonderful it is when both partners fantasies are in sync. Exploring them together involves lots communication, sharing of private feelings and thoughts, and looking deep into ones own interior. There is an intrinsic vulnerability to this process. And it turns out this is an *amazing* way not only create deep, lasting pleasure for each, but also to build incredible intimacy, and a continually deepening bond. It feels emotionally risky, because of the revealing of inner self that it requires (and it is - no doubt about that!), but done slowly and carefully, it is immensely powerful - and quintessentially human.
And this happens, with the caveat that the fantasies don't involve lasting harm to anyone, *no matter what the fantasies are* - no matter how 'kinky' they may seem, mutual exploration of this synchronicity seems to always lead to greater intimacy, greater love. Two - oh, sorry, *three* :-) - people find each other and can create this private world where together they reveal and manifest their deepest psychological and sexual needs.
Which is a very, very, very beautiful thing!!!
So-called 'deviant' sexaulity, judged by the 'normal' world as depraved, leads to the same, deep - perhaps even deeper - human connection that 'conventional' sex is supposed to foster. I find that just so thrilling.
Dianne, Paul, terri - congratulations to all of you. It's a beautiful thing!
Love to all,